Dearest Everybody,
It’s that time of year again when holiday cheer is in the
air, snow is on the ground and the Maguire Family Christmas letter is in your
hands. In what seems to be an annual
tradition now, Lenny again thought he was going to write this year’s
letter. I couldn’t find a delicate way
to tell Lenny that he has neither the wit nor eloquence to author a letter
deserving our family name. So I told him he’s in charge of writing our 4th
of July letter next year. Be sure to
watch for THAT one… Anyhow, as I think of how to sum up the Maguires’ last year
there really seems to be a recurring theme of travel. And by travel, I mean
Lenny and I did a lot of staying home with Grandpa Maguire and Spats came to
stay with us.
Mom and Dad started the year off by taking a trip to visit
their friends Jim and Kathy in Washington, D.C.
There they got to see all of the monuments and historic places. Dad and Jim even posed with a crazy
conspiracy theorist outside the White House who was running for president. Mom stuck with posing in front of
monuments. They even survived a
blizzard. Not a real blizzard, mind you. Just about 3 inches of snow which brought the
whole D.C. area to a stand-still. Lenny
and I watched lots of TV with Grandpa and chased Spats (the dog with unending
energy) around the yard for a few days.
A few weeks later, Dad talked Mom into celebrating one of
his favorite holidays in Chicago.
Grandpa came over to tell us of our Irish heritage while Mom and Dad
celebrated St. Patty’s Day in Chicago with their friend Steve and Cousin
Bill. They showed me pictures with lots
of silly outfits, a parade, and a green river.
I still really don’t get the point of the trip, but they really seemed
to enjoy it.
Let me tell you about running. Running has to be the dumbest thing
ever. Apparently people run miles on end
for FUN. I mean, I could see if they
were chasing a balls or doing laps in the backyard, but seriously if you are
going more than a few blocks, take a car.
Besides, there is no way to sniff interesting things if you are
travelling at any pace faster than a mosey.
Nonetheless, Mom has become a ‘runner’.
We kinda thought this might be a fad or a phase, but it seems to have
stuck. In April, Mom tried to share her
sickness with Dad. He ran a half
marathon with Mom. They both did well
and Mom began to talk all kinds of crazy talk about running a WHOLE
marathon. Dad offered to watch.
After the run, Mom and Dad got to go to Hawaii to visit
Uncle Bill and Aunt Maureen. Since they
were lucky enough to have the world’s most hospitable relatives (and great tour
guides), they got to see and do EVERYTHING there is in Maui. Mom learned to surf (Dad never got up on the
board), they biked down from the top of a volcano, and they got to snorkel with
giant sea-turtles. They even came within
a few feet of a GIANT stingray.
Crikey! On the downside, their
car got broken into and Dad had his wallet stolen. Worse yet, the camera with all of their
pictures was taken. Seriously. Aren’t
cops supposed to know better? Anyhow, Uncle
Bill and Aunt Maureen made sure to help get all kinds of new pictures to
memorialize the trip. Grandpa and Spats
came to enjoy the April showers in South Lyon with Lenny and me. We didn’t take any pictures.
As the weather started to get warmer, Mom took Dad along to
her annual debate-nerd conference on Mackinac Island. I am told this was incredible as they got to
stay in a huge room in the Grand Hotel.
They had their very own balcony overlooking the Mackinac Bridge. Spats showed Lenny and me how to hunt moles in
the backyard. Grandpa got fudge.
Once summer rolled around, Mom started to get really
consumed with the whole ‘running’ thing again.
She made Dad run the Dexter-Ann Arbor half marathon with her. He survived that to run with her in a 10k
sponsored by the police in Farmington Hills.
Dad won his age group and got a plaque.
Mom later told me that it was only because there were, like, 5 people in
Dad’s age group. Dad decided to end his
running career on a high note. Mom, on
the other hand, committed to running a full marathon and spent nearly every
waking hour of the summertime running.
Sometimes she even got up at dawn to run 15 to 20 miles. Dad just laughed and cheered her on. He said that the more she ran the less time
she had to come up with ‘projects’ for him.
While Mom and Dad planned to do lots of camping this year,
they only made it out once. But they
made it a heck of a trip and booked a lovely site in Muskegon. Mom led Dad on all kinds of nature hikes in
the woods and sand dunes. They even
expanded their camping setup to include a nice big camping stove and screen
tent. Lenny and I enjoyed the AC with
Grandpa and Spats. The screen tent
sounds lovely, but I am holding out until they get a camper.
The harp was dusted off and Mom got Dad to finish tiling the
rest of the house to match the kitchen.
Dad isn’t really all that handy with ‘tools’ and ‘home-improvements’ so
he suckered Grandpa and John to come show him what to do. I think Dad was mostly just their
helper. Lenny and I tried our hardest to
get our snouts in the grout. The outcome
is an AMAZING new floor. They say that
it makes the house look a million times better and is easy to clean. All I know is there is nothing better than a
nice cool tile floor on the belly during the dog days of August.
Also over the summer, Lenny went with Dad to his annual K9
certification trials in Grand Rapids and Detroit. They did all right, I guess. Lenny brought home some trophies, but it’s
not like any of them were first place or anything. I know you don’t care, but Mom said I had to
mention it. The more exciting part of
the weekend was that Mom and I got to visit Grandma and Grandpa Tackebury at
their cottage up north. The car ride was
a little long, but it was definitely worth it once we got there. What a relaxing treat for an over-worked dog
such as myself. I liked it so much that
we went back again in October and I even let Lenny come with.
The fall came around which means Dad starts to find things
to do around the house so he doesn’t have to listen to Mom complaining about
the start of a new school year. Mom is
teaching debate and Honors English this year.
Somehow she is once again coaching debate. Or, as I call it, “Nerd-Herding”. She has started to transition her team to a
new style of debate and is getting some other schools and coaches involved,
too. I think she will coach debate until
she retires… Or at least until the debate community crowns her “Queen
Nerd”.
One of Dad’s favorite autumnal activities is using his
riding mower to pick up the leaves. I am
pretty sure it might take twice as long as raking, but I think he just likes to
ride his little tractor around. Oh, I
almost forgot. Lenny learned something this fall. He learned not to mess with the black cats
with white stripes. Yep. Ole’ Leonard
got skunked at work with Dad. It stunk
up their car, Dad’s uniform, the police station, and everything. Lenny still stinks. Hilarious.
In October, all of the running paid off. Mom ran her first marathon. Mom ran the Chicago Marathon, which was
amazing not only because she ran 26.2 miles for no reason, but she did it in 90
degree heat with crazy humidity. Even
though they tried to kick her off the course and make her walk, she ran to the
end. Aunt Greta even went to help cheer
her on with cousin Bill. Ever since she
hit the finish line she has been planning her next marathon. Oh… Me?
Well Lenny and I stayed home with Grandpa and got text-message updates
on Mom’s races. I was told I wouldn’t
like the ‘Big City’ anyhow.
Throughout November, Dad could not help but be reminded that
his days as a twenty-something were drawing near an end. The week before his birthday, Mom pulled off
a nice surprise party for him. Friends
came from as far as Texas and D.C. and lots of people were there to help Dad
celebrate turning 30. The next day, Dad
was not sure how many of those people were his friends as he said he felt like
he was going to die. Nonetheless, Dad
was totally surprised and got something he NEVER thought he’d get out of
Mom. A new TV. Dad has pretty much been glued to it ever
since he got it and Mom says that we could park cars in the backyard and show
movies. I haven’t figured out the remote
yet. Somebody will have to teach me and
Grandpa for when Mom and Dad go on their next stupid adventure without me.
Well I could carry on with more exciting tales, but I think it’s about time to guilt Mom into running around the backyard with me. I really don’t even like playing that much, but you should see how ridiculous she looks when SHE chases ME around the backyard. The neighbors think it’s hilarious. I hope you and yours have a wonderful Christmas and a happy New Year.
Merry Christmas,
Beaumont, Patrick, Hattie, and Lenny
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